Fate!!!

I've just received an email from him. Sad news today. One of his friends from university died in a traffic accident yesterday. It makes me think about fate!

Fate, do I believe in it?

As I was a child, I had no idea about fate. Of course, I just believed in my parents and myself. I believed that we could make our lives better and better by our endeavors... So in my mind, there' s no fate at all.

But, when my papa died, I became believing in fate. But I hate it much. Fate just brought me so much sadness and loneliness. I lost my papa forever.

So, I believe in fate.

When I grew up, I met him in junior high school. I thought that I fell in love with him. One more time I believed in fate. Fate brought us to the earth, and gave us changes to meet each other. My first love went away then. I didn't know how much sad I was. I just said that fate took him away again.

Then, I'm scared of fate!

I was really scared of fate when I heard that he died 2 years ago. I resented of fate. Why did you take him away? I asked this question a thousand times before... Then I became a silent girl... Til I met you, 3 girls in my life.

I had a wonderful time with you, in both Junior high schood and high school also. I felt that life is so worthy to live. I was wrapped in my family's love, my friend's love. I am a lucky girl.

And, I'm alway thinking about fate!

I met a boy in my university, who looked like him a lot. I felt so abashed when I recognized his shape, his face... but not his skin and his voice...

I knew that fate brought him to me again... But that's fate, we didn't belong to each other. Just started as friends and stopped as friends...

Sometimes I wondered if he felt the same feeling as mine. Would he regret anything? But I knew deep inside me, he's not the man for my life... He's just visit my life but not my fate.

Now, I do believe in fate.

I'm a happy girl. I have a good job. I have a good man. I have something to expect... And more than that, I have a lovely family....